
^^^ The New York Times, January 2, 1979
Happy new year, everyone. Please join me as I rewind to this day, 41 years agoโฆ
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On New Yearโs Day, 1979, at 13, I was in an earthquake.
I was visiting my aunt, uncle, and cousins in a suburb of L.A. when the entire house began trembling. During the main event and subsequent aftershocks, some knick-knacks fell off shelves and paintings came off the walls, but fortunately none of us got hurt.
The first day of that year marked the last day of my big-girl solo trip โ my aunt and uncleโs bat mitzvah present to me โ and I was sad to see the week come to an end. Iโd been so excited to visit my relatives, having missed them terribly since theyโd moved from the east coast in โ77.
Also, I had been certain that in L.A., I was going to get DISCOVERED. I was going to be a star.
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In those days, I felt devastated that my parents wouldnโt let me go on the try-outs for movies, TV shows, musicals, and commercials that a local talent agent wanted to send me on. I knew that if I wanted to break into show business, Iโd have to take matters into my own hands.
So I went to L.A. with an agenda; I told my aunt and uncle my intentions, and they took me to a piano bar/restaurant to perform. All I needed was one lucky break, just one big deal agent who might randomly venture out to a cheesy piano bar/restaurant on a Monday night to be blown away by a โtween belting her heart out.

^^^ Clockwise from left: Playing Lola in Damn Yankees in seventh grade; singing โBlind Dateโ from Funny Lady in the 1979 recital of the Long Beach Childrenโs Theatrical Workshop; handing out pamphlets on The Hunger Project to people waiting for the Rose Bowl Parade to begin on 1/1/79, hours before the earthquake occurred.
On the list of songs, there was only one I knew well enough to sing all the way through: Morris Albertโs โFeelings.โ When my turn came, I put down my fork, stood up at my place at our table, and gave it my all.
Feeeeeeeelings. Whoa, whoah, whoa, feeeeeeeelingsโฆ.๐ถ
I felt shaky at first, but then the world fell away, and for three-minutes-and-forty-four seconds, Iโฆwasโฆaโฆs t a a a a r. ๐ซโจ

And then it was over. Somebody elseโs turn. A guy got up and sang Elvin Bishopโs โFooled Around and Fell in Love.โ
No cigar-chomping agent came up to me to say, โStick with me, Kid โ Iโm gonna make you a star,โ as Iโd fantasized. My big chance never came. A couple of days later the earthquake would occur. The day after that, Iโd fly back to my unglamorous life in the Long Island suburbs. Life would go on.
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You might be wondering how this story relates to the subject of this newsletter, tracing my wayward career path. Hereโs the connection: Recently I decided to stop beating myself up about beginning some of the 2013 book events for Goodbye to All That by, um โฆ singing songs.
As I planned my tour, it seemed like the most natural thing to do. I somehow persuaded some generous musician friends to play with me โ Chris Butler on bass, Ann Klein (<โ a song called โHappy New Yearโ!) on guitar, my husband Brian on drums, me on ukulele and vocals. We worked on a few NYC-related songs, including LCD Sound Systemโs โNew York I Love You But Youโre Bringing Me Down,โ and performed them at events. (We even shot a book trailer video with us playing the LCD Sound System song, but I couldnโt get the rights to it, so I put one together using a song in the public domain.)

^^^ A โbandโ rehearsal circa August 2013.
It didnโt occur to me to be embarrassed, or to think it unprofessional (or silly) to sing at a book event โ until I learned at the last minute that one of the bigger name contributors to the anthology (someone very serious) was going to be in town to read at an event the โbandโ would be playing.
We went through with our performance and the audience loved it. Then a few contributors read, including the very serious one. It was a wonderful evening. But I have been cringing ever since, imagining that writer and everyone else in publishing judging me.
Wellโฆthat is until I started talking with my editor at Seal Press about the possibility of an updated edition of Goodby to All That. (More on that soon, I hope.) Reader, one of the first thoughts I had was: Oooh โ what songs am I going to sing at events?!
Not because I want to be a famous singer โย I gave up on that a long, long time ago โ but because I freaking love to sing. And because performing is in my DNA. And where is it written that a reading canโt also have other kinds of entertainment???
So, if an updated edition of that anthology comes to fruition, expect me to open up readings warbling a tune or two. Because thatโs exactly the kind of weirdo I am. Iโm not going to apologize for it, or kick myself for it later. Iโm just going to do it.

Hmmmโฆ I wonder if theyโd let me hold a book event at Sid Goldโs Request Room in Manhattan, another piano bar where I recently spent an evening in absolute heaven. Itโs my new happy place. If it had existed when I lived in NYC, I would have been there every single nightโฆ
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โข If you like my anthologies and are thinking of putting together one of your own, please consider taking my anthology editing course at Catapult.
โข Hereโs another reminder aboutย my new Skillshare class โย an introductory level personal essay workshop. You can getย two free monthsย of Skillshare Premium if you sign up for my class.
โข Iโll resume reviewing my wayward career path โย starting with gossip reporting in the mid-90s โ next time.