I too scored somewhat high on the tests on the website you mentioned, having a past therapist mention it might be a factor for my lifelong anxiety and later depression at puberty. My sons are formally diagnosed- one ASD and one ADHD. I have always been weird, and found myself in theater, because what a relief to play others instead of be yourself. I had, and still have more curiosity than I knew what to do with on a range of topics, and I would obsess over them. I had no issue picking up bones, frogs, trying to rehab stunned birds, watching surgeries and medical procedures, observing fighting with weapons, reading obsessively in the library on religion, esoterica, mythology, certain sciences, history, certain authors. I didn’t understand female hierarchy in groups. I didn’t understand male behavior after I turned 12. I was told I asked too many questions.
I get lonely sometimes but I tend to prefer my own company unless I can relate to someone on a good level. I hide my weirdness around other moms at my son’s school because I don’t want him to be excluded. But I also don’t socialize with them often because many times I can’t relate- Im not a big drinker, I’m not into sports, I’m not into complaining about my sons, I’m not Christian, and hair, clothes, shoes, etc only lasts so long in a convo.
I am a polite Southern lady on the outside. On the inside I’m a swamp witch who loves science and art, gothic/folk horror, poetry and listening to the woods. I’m weird.
But I’m not obsessed with restrictions on reproductive rights, sex education, climate change research, voting rights and blaming immigrants for our country’s problems. That’s beyond weird- that’s just…wrong.
I think when people call the hard right “weird” they mean wrong, as in the sky is green and purple before a tornado weird or the hair on the back of your neck standing way up when you know danger is very close weird. The bad scary weird. Not like us- who are just different in our own ways.
Yes, all of this! (And I love your kind of weird.) My husband and I were discussing how much we like 'weird' and don't like how the word's being used politically. 'Creepy' would be much clearer. I claim 'weird' for the good folks.
We humans all exist somewhere along the bell shaped curve that is our spectrum. While we are are more similar than different, we are enriched and thrive with our differences. If we were all the same, life would be sooo boring! Diversity expands our gene pools and makes us stronger.
I still want to get that “bitter taste” image/words they put on battery packaging as a tattoo, just haven’t figured out where I’d put it. Well, I don’t think autism is weird, but that’s probably because I grew up with an autistic father and have many of his traits, myself. I do think calling Donald “weird” is fairly innocuous and generous. I mean, weird doesn’t have bad connotations overall. Remember they say in Portlant OR, “stay weird!” So, it’s a positive, usually. I think we’re just signaling that we don’t want to “normalize" his behavior. “Weird” is almost too nice!
I agree that we should defend the word “weird” and celebrate it. Weird is good! Weird is interesting and necessary for us humans to be creative with our ideas and our society.
I also came to autistic self awareness late but I had to adapt because I was more or less stuck in the business world at the time…with few ways to earn enough outside of it to pay Seattle mortgages…I learned that masking isn’t so bad, it’s just really exhausting…and so working for myself became important because it eliminated the drama of colleagues…
I think that autism has become the diagnosis du jour. And it, in a way, dismisses that so many of us can just be "different" without sticking a label on it.
And, I, too, am not sold on "weird" as a campaign tool.
Oh my I have misophonia too. I thought I was such a weirdo that I had to hold my hands over my ears when my dad chewed lemon drops the ENTIRE FUCKING WAY from Baltimore to the Poconos every summer. STOP, I would yell. Such a weirdo I was. Decades later, I came across an NYT article detailing misophonia. It has a name! I have a thing! And ASMR makes me rage. Don't know how you can take it!
Yes, this kind of thing makes me nuts! So many triggers from particular people's eating. Only certain kinds of ASMR work for me. Other kinds bother me.
I did the online autism test and came out borderline. I’m 75 and won’t pursue an official diagnosis. Am so relieved this subject is being discussed as it gives me understanding about the many difficult paths I’ve chosen in life. Thank you again Sari for once again opening up this issue.
Uhmm ... I think the political reference to "weirdo" was more generic. It refrains from calling right-wing/ far right-wing Republicans anything personal, just a generic kind of "weirdo". For instance, it does not go near "intellectually inbred idiots" or "fear mongering mother fuckers with tiny dicks" (or the much too common "dickhead" perjorative often used by loving siblings in a moment of frustration -- or ennui. It just blows softly on "dick head" as in we have all met a jerk a time or two in our lives and we move on.
Have no worry that political exhale somehow diminishes or taints your, mine and our beloved individualism, be it sprectrum-inspired or not. (Everyone is somewhere on the spectrum.) The main difference, methinks, is the implied sense of trying to be polite (as Dems -- like most folks -- are want to do) and not up the perception of crazed-white-man-on-the-fringe having any sense of gravitas (other than Mr. Maga-T's general weight and air of a faux pas being publicly launched in a stuck elevator).
In short, feel free to own your beautiful, inspired and questioning human uniqueness (a.k.a. weirdness) and let the MAGA-Ts crawl back into whatever hate hole they crawled out of.
Wow. Looks like all my people are here. I scored a 36, which doesn't surprise me in the least, considering my fiance always tells me he likes my kind of weird and routinely says, "OK, rainman," when I do certain things.
My kids have known since they were little that my least favorite noises in the world are chewing, swallowing, and what I like to call "gulping" noises. I don't want to hear anybody consuming something. I'm still grossed out remembering my dad slurping his Raisin Bran for breakfast when I was a kid. (I'm 50 and the mere thought of it gives me the heebie jeebies even now).
I didn't know about the autism-eating disorder link. That's very interesting. Another point for me being autistic. I think the diagnosis might be helpful for someone who beats themself up for being different, blaming themselves. Knowing their brain has different wiring might help someone be more forgiving of themselves, and might help them find others with similar characteristics. But if those things aren't a concern I don't think a formal diagnosis is a necessity. "Sociopathic" would be a much better word than "weird" for the white christian nationalist party memebers.
That makes sense, Steph. I feel like I’ve worked hard to switch from beating myself up for being weird, to leaning into it and accepting myself. It goes better some times than others. And yes to calling them “sociopathic” instead. 💕
Hi Sari, I totally agree with you-- calling Trump "weird" is not just wrong, but dangerously light and, in my opinion, "normalizes" him waaaay too much! In our family we recognize "weird" as a virtue, a sign that someone has the strength to express their individuality! To be different from the norm in a not-bowing-to-peer-pressure uniformity or to widely accepted conventions. The courage to be different. For someone as brainless, fear-mongering, and dangerous as Trump, labelling him "weird" is a serious misstep. I was shocked when I first heard it on NPR, and more shocked when it seemed to take off. I can't understand what Dems think might be accomplished by using it! "Weird" can even be a compliment! Thoreau was "weird" and brilliant: Trump is neither.
You make a good point, Lucinda. I think it's maybe dangerous that we're labeling DT and JDV "weird," because that barely scratches the surface on what a threat they are. Thanks.
I'm a sister-in-law of Julie Hedrick and Peter Wetzler (married to Rick Wetzler)--I meant to make my comment public on your comment thread, and then to write just this in a note to you! But the Southern woman captured what I would have said about myself, except the swamp witch part--though engaging with my 17yo's friends' parents is hard b/c I don't talk about clothes, either!! And I'm nearly 20 years older than all of them . . . Whatevahs.
It’s just Governor Walz being ‘Minnesota Nice’. He’s too polite early on to call Trump the labels he deserves. Doesn’t mean he won’t get aggressive soon or that we all can call Trump his well deserved labels online, on billboards, bumper stickers, yard signs, county and state fairs, protesting his campaign appearances, etc. I agree with the above that creepy is more accurate but we can go so, so, so much further than that gentle name calling.
Weird is good, as I tell my kids. I'm so glad to read this"weird pride" post. I hide my quirks, thoughts, anxieties, opinions quite a bit. Hiding flattens me. Thanks for the encouragement to just not.
For many years I have told people, "If I call you a weirdo, don't take offense, because I like weirdos." So I have weird feeling about using the word weird as a slur word.
Oh my, Sari. I LOVE this so much! We have an incredible amount of things in common in our personhood. I am a Gen X 'er on the ND spectrum with misophonia, an aversion to artificial light, and asmr enthusiasm. I'm also a weirdo. My entire life I have felt strange, other, different. Too many traumas to list. I've spent decades learning how to embrace weirdness- in myself and others. To lean hard into it. I have a ton of tattoos ( am getting a new one next week, as a matter of fact! Yay!) and of course , " at my age" , there is plenty of push back about said decision to display body art. I don't really care. I'm a 58 year old empty nester weirdo. I'm working on a memoir which originally going to be entitled; " And then things really got weird", but I decided it will be a chapter title instead. It's so funny. Well, NOT funny, that in the cult I was raised in, we weren't allowed to use the word weird. I don't even know what the reasoning behind that rule was...not that anything about my life held hostage in a cult for 26 years made sense! It gave me a pang when Governor Walz decided to use the word as a pejorative. We need to reclaim the word, the concept. We need to reclaim the flag and the color red! What the right is, and what they are doing, is SO far beyond mere "weirdness". Other than that, however, I have no criticism of the Democratic Party. No way. I'm immensely proud to be blue...AND to be weird.
I too scored somewhat high on the tests on the website you mentioned, having a past therapist mention it might be a factor for my lifelong anxiety and later depression at puberty. My sons are formally diagnosed- one ASD and one ADHD. I have always been weird, and found myself in theater, because what a relief to play others instead of be yourself. I had, and still have more curiosity than I knew what to do with on a range of topics, and I would obsess over them. I had no issue picking up bones, frogs, trying to rehab stunned birds, watching surgeries and medical procedures, observing fighting with weapons, reading obsessively in the library on religion, esoterica, mythology, certain sciences, history, certain authors. I didn’t understand female hierarchy in groups. I didn’t understand male behavior after I turned 12. I was told I asked too many questions.
I get lonely sometimes but I tend to prefer my own company unless I can relate to someone on a good level. I hide my weirdness around other moms at my son’s school because I don’t want him to be excluded. But I also don’t socialize with them often because many times I can’t relate- Im not a big drinker, I’m not into sports, I’m not into complaining about my sons, I’m not Christian, and hair, clothes, shoes, etc only lasts so long in a convo.
I am a polite Southern lady on the outside. On the inside I’m a swamp witch who loves science and art, gothic/folk horror, poetry and listening to the woods. I’m weird.
But I’m not obsessed with restrictions on reproductive rights, sex education, climate change research, voting rights and blaming immigrants for our country’s problems. That’s beyond weird- that’s just…wrong.
I think when people call the hard right “weird” they mean wrong, as in the sky is green and purple before a tornado weird or the hair on the back of your neck standing way up when you know danger is very close weird. The bad scary weird. Not like us- who are just different in our own ways.
You are one of my kind. <3
Yes, all of this! (And I love your kind of weird.) My husband and I were discussing how much we like 'weird' and don't like how the word's being used politically. 'Creepy' would be much clearer. I claim 'weird' for the good folks.
Yes, "weird" for the good folks only!
Great distinction! Thank you!
We humans all exist somewhere along the bell shaped curve that is our spectrum. While we are are more similar than different, we are enriched and thrive with our differences. If we were all the same, life would be sooo boring! Diversity expands our gene pools and makes us stronger.
I still want to get that “bitter taste” image/words they put on battery packaging as a tattoo, just haven’t figured out where I’d put it. Well, I don’t think autism is weird, but that’s probably because I grew up with an autistic father and have many of his traits, myself. I do think calling Donald “weird” is fairly innocuous and generous. I mean, weird doesn’t have bad connotations overall. Remember they say in Portlant OR, “stay weird!” So, it’s a positive, usually. I think we’re just signaling that we don’t want to “normalize" his behavior. “Weird” is almost too nice!
This image, not the whole Duracell ad:
https://tinybeans.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/4_Pack_Front_Bitterant-e1602096459206.jpg
I love that, and also your other tattoo, "As Is" in a heart. I just don't want the association with DT and JDV to rebrand weird as bad!
I hear you. How can we morph it to “creepy”? More accurate and appropriate.
100%!
I agree that we should defend the word “weird” and celebrate it. Weird is good! Weird is interesting and necessary for us humans to be creative with our ideas and our society.
Yes.
Agree with this so much. More than the like button will let me.
<3
I also came to autistic self awareness late but I had to adapt because I was more or less stuck in the business world at the time…with few ways to earn enough outside of it to pay Seattle mortgages…I learned that masking isn’t so bad, it’s just really exhausting…and so working for myself became important because it eliminated the drama of colleagues…
Relatable!
May I take the “Questionnaire” ?
I think that autism has become the diagnosis du jour. And it, in a way, dismisses that so many of us can just be "different" without sticking a label on it.
And, I, too, am not sold on "weird" as a campaign tool.
Yes, that is another of my concerns about perusing a diagnosis—seems over-diagnosed right now.
Oh my I have misophonia too. I thought I was such a weirdo that I had to hold my hands over my ears when my dad chewed lemon drops the ENTIRE FUCKING WAY from Baltimore to the Poconos every summer. STOP, I would yell. Such a weirdo I was. Decades later, I came across an NYT article detailing misophonia. It has a name! I have a thing! And ASMR makes me rage. Don't know how you can take it!
Yes, this kind of thing makes me nuts! So many triggers from particular people's eating. Only certain kinds of ASMR work for me. Other kinds bother me.
I also love my tattoos. Got my first one at age 65; I've gotten one each year since. Already planning what to do for my 70th coming up this fall.
Love it. I almost got another last week, but I wasn't sure about what I wanted.
I did the online autism test and came out borderline. I’m 75 and won’t pursue an official diagnosis. Am so relieved this subject is being discussed as it gives me understanding about the many difficult paths I’ve chosen in life. Thank you again Sari for once again opening up this issue.
Glad this resonated, Janice.
Uhmm ... I think the political reference to "weirdo" was more generic. It refrains from calling right-wing/ far right-wing Republicans anything personal, just a generic kind of "weirdo". For instance, it does not go near "intellectually inbred idiots" or "fear mongering mother fuckers with tiny dicks" (or the much too common "dickhead" perjorative often used by loving siblings in a moment of frustration -- or ennui. It just blows softly on "dick head" as in we have all met a jerk a time or two in our lives and we move on.
Have no worry that political exhale somehow diminishes or taints your, mine and our beloved individualism, be it sprectrum-inspired or not. (Everyone is somewhere on the spectrum.) The main difference, methinks, is the implied sense of trying to be polite (as Dems -- like most folks -- are want to do) and not up the perception of crazed-white-man-on-the-fringe having any sense of gravitas (other than Mr. Maga-T's general weight and air of a faux pas being publicly launched in a stuck elevator).
In short, feel free to own your beautiful, inspired and questioning human uniqueness (a.k.a. weirdness) and let the MAGA-Ts crawl back into whatever hate hole they crawled out of.
Namaste.
Wow. Looks like all my people are here. I scored a 36, which doesn't surprise me in the least, considering my fiance always tells me he likes my kind of weird and routinely says, "OK, rainman," when I do certain things.
My kids have known since they were little that my least favorite noises in the world are chewing, swallowing, and what I like to call "gulping" noises. I don't want to hear anybody consuming something. I'm still grossed out remembering my dad slurping his Raisin Bran for breakfast when I was a kid. (I'm 50 and the mere thought of it gives me the heebie jeebies even now).
Perfectly normal, right?
Thanks for making me feel less alone. <3
I didn't know about the autism-eating disorder link. That's very interesting. Another point for me being autistic. I think the diagnosis might be helpful for someone who beats themself up for being different, blaming themselves. Knowing their brain has different wiring might help someone be more forgiving of themselves, and might help them find others with similar characteristics. But if those things aren't a concern I don't think a formal diagnosis is a necessity. "Sociopathic" would be a much better word than "weird" for the white christian nationalist party memebers.
That makes sense, Steph. I feel like I’ve worked hard to switch from beating myself up for being weird, to leaning into it and accepting myself. It goes better some times than others. And yes to calling them “sociopathic” instead. 💕
Hi Sari, I totally agree with you-- calling Trump "weird" is not just wrong, but dangerously light and, in my opinion, "normalizes" him waaaay too much! In our family we recognize "weird" as a virtue, a sign that someone has the strength to express their individuality! To be different from the norm in a not-bowing-to-peer-pressure uniformity or to widely accepted conventions. The courage to be different. For someone as brainless, fear-mongering, and dangerous as Trump, labelling him "weird" is a serious misstep. I was shocked when I first heard it on NPR, and more shocked when it seemed to take off. I can't understand what Dems think might be accomplished by using it! "Weird" can even be a compliment! Thoreau was "weird" and brilliant: Trump is neither.
You make a good point, Lucinda. I think it's maybe dangerous that we're labeling DT and JDV "weird," because that barely scratches the surface on what a threat they are. Thanks.
Hi Sari,
I'm a sister-in-law of Julie Hedrick and Peter Wetzler (married to Rick Wetzler)--I meant to make my comment public on your comment thread, and then to write just this in a note to you! But the Southern woman captured what I would have said about myself, except the swamp witch part--though engaging with my 17yo's friends' parents is hard b/c I don't talk about clothes, either!! And I'm nearly 20 years older than all of them . . . Whatevahs.
Peter and Julie are wonderful. And I have done a staycation at their Church Des Artistes. Glad to know you can relate. And good to "meet" you.
It’s just Governor Walz being ‘Minnesota Nice’. He’s too polite early on to call Trump the labels he deserves. Doesn’t mean he won’t get aggressive soon or that we all can call Trump his well deserved labels online, on billboards, bumper stickers, yard signs, county and state fairs, protesting his campaign appearances, etc. I agree with the above that creepy is more accurate but we can go so, so, so much further than that gentle name calling.
Weird is good, as I tell my kids. I'm so glad to read this"weird pride" post. I hide my quirks, thoughts, anxieties, opinions quite a bit. Hiding flattens me. Thanks for the encouragement to just not.
<3
For many years I have told people, "If I call you a weirdo, don't take offense, because I like weirdos." So I have weird feeling about using the word weird as a slur word.
Oh my, Sari. I LOVE this so much! We have an incredible amount of things in common in our personhood. I am a Gen X 'er on the ND spectrum with misophonia, an aversion to artificial light, and asmr enthusiasm. I'm also a weirdo. My entire life I have felt strange, other, different. Too many traumas to list. I've spent decades learning how to embrace weirdness- in myself and others. To lean hard into it. I have a ton of tattoos ( am getting a new one next week, as a matter of fact! Yay!) and of course , " at my age" , there is plenty of push back about said decision to display body art. I don't really care. I'm a 58 year old empty nester weirdo. I'm working on a memoir which originally going to be entitled; " And then things really got weird", but I decided it will be a chapter title instead. It's so funny. Well, NOT funny, that in the cult I was raised in, we weren't allowed to use the word weird. I don't even know what the reasoning behind that rule was...not that anything about my life held hostage in a cult for 26 years made sense! It gave me a pang when Governor Walz decided to use the word as a pejorative. We need to reclaim the word, the concept. We need to reclaim the flag and the color red! What the right is, and what they are doing, is SO far beyond mere "weirdness". Other than that, however, I have no criticism of the Democratic Party. No way. I'm immensely proud to be blue...AND to be weird.
Thanks for letting me know how much you relate, Lisa!